“Why Are Boys Falling Behind?” Is the Wrong Question

We should be asking: why are there not enough men doing feminist work?

In many ways, Finland is the poster country of gender equality. 

But boys are falling behind, and many blame feminism. 

It’s easy to say “You go girl” and celebrate the wins of women in power. But what about young men and young boys who are now living in this “future is female” world, where girls are encouraged to “go for it”?  

Why are boys falling behind? 

60% of men in Finland think no more progress is needed, and half of them believe that feminist movements like #MeToo restrict men’s rights. This perception is particularly common among younger men, who feel that feminism has gone too far.

Most don’t like the answer to why boys are falling behind.

The patriarchal world is designed to serve the mediocre man. If men were taught to embrace feminism, they would better understand why some people succeed — and how to live in a truly equal society.

Patriarchal systems are built in a way that men don’t need to be more competent or smarter to succeed. Simply being a man has been enough. Women have historically been, and continue to be, oppressed to ensure that men don’t have to work harder or pursue more education to maintain their positions. In many cases, being male alone puts someone in an advantaged position.

As society has progressed toward equality, women have gained more access to education and the workplace. They no longer need their husband’s permission to work, and they’ve started to claim rights that men have always had.

Women’s status is far from being fully equal, but yes, we occasionally hear about men “falling behind” in certain areas. That’s often because they haven’t learned how to navigate an equal society or because women are “better suited” for some roles.

However, much of this is rooted in learned behaviors. Boys and girls are not raised the same way. Boys must be taught about equality from an early age so that it won’t surprise them when someone else does better.

Boys need to understand that success is often about competence, not gender. 

This Brings Me to a Question: Why Aren’t More Men Involved in the Feminist Work?

Feminism is fundamentally about equality — about closing the gap between genders. It’s not the opposite of patriarchy. It doesn’t seek to establish a matriarchy where women hold all the power.

So, why aren’t more men participating in this work to create a more equal society for everyone?

The answer might be that in a patriarchal society, a mediocre man can get by just fine without ever having to think about equality — or his own privilege.

That comfort has made it easy for men to ignore the need for change.

I would personally like to invite also men to attend our feminist business conference Crush at the Helsinki Stock Exchange Building in May. This will be one of the topics.

Ps. Not all boys are falling behind. Not those who have been raised to live in an equal society.